It’s been 1 week and 1 day since our IVF transfer, and it’s safe to say that every day I have done something that has raised doubts of a successful procedure. Along with the doubt has come tears, frustration, sleepless nights and lots and lots of praying.
Have you ever wanted something so bad that it literally hurts? Yet most days it seems so far away. After we had Braxton, we assumed that getting pregnant this time around would be easier than the our last go, but we were wrong. Secondary infertility is a real thing, and it sucks!
As we sit and wait to learn the fate of our IVF procedure, there are some things I suggest you NOT do during the two week wait following IVF.
Stay off the Internet: Every symptom, cramp, pain that has risen during our wait, I have gone straight to Google to address my concerns. I highly recommend avoiding this because it has left me hopeless, in tears, fearful and in doubt.
Don’t Look up IVF Success Rates: You will quite literally make yourself crazy by researching IVF success rates. Every clinic and individual success rates will vary. There are different factors that contribute to a patient’s infertility, and every clinic handles the situation differently based on their needs.
Confide in other IVF’ers, but Don’t assume your experience will mirror their experience: I have one close friend that I have confided in over the years that had a successful IVF with the same doctor we are patients of. I have leaned on her and asked her a million questions, and if there is one thing I’ll pass along that she has shared with me, it’s that EVERYONE is different. Everyone will have different symptoms, side-effects, some will have spotting, others won’t. I highly recommend finding someone you can confide in that truly understands what you’re going through, BUT understand that their experience will most likely differ from yours.
Don’t stop Praying: Even when you have doubts, and when you’re frustrated beyond belief because of the painful shots, raging hormones and numerous sleepless nights, don’t ever stop praying. Pray without ceasing. He hears you.
Don’t overexert yourself: If you’re anything like me, you’re always on the Go. Try to relax and avoid excessive exercise. I’m not saying that you should stop doing what you’re already doing, just take it a little easy.
Don’t Stress: I know that this is easier said than done, but it’s so important to avoid stressful situations if at all possible. Try to remain calm and try not to stress out about every symptom that arises during the wait.
Don’t push your Spouse away: IVF takes a toll on a marriage both physically and emotionally, as well as financially. The entire process of IVF from start to finish is hard, and it affects your spouse just as much as it affects you. Keep that in mind, and pull them in closer instead of pushing them away.
Don’t assume that Spotting is necessary a bad thing: Some women will spot during their cycle. It doesn’t always mean that IVF failed. It could be completely normal and could possibly be the result of implantation. Don’t assume that spotting during your cycle means that your period is pending. Also, keep in mind that progesterone, which most women take following their transfer, can cause breakthrough spotting.
Don’t take an At-Home Pregnancy Test: I’m guilty of doing this. I took one this morning, and I was heartbroken when it came back negative. Some important things to remember when taking an at-home pregnancy test is that some women don’t produce high enough HCG levels to trigger a positive urine test. It may also been too soon to test because some women won’t product a high enough amount of HCG until two weeks plus following the IVF transfer. Don’t remove yourself from the game quite yet.
Everybody reacts to IVF and the medications differently. By refraining from jumping onto the internet at the first sign of spotting or cramping, comparing your experience to others, pushing away your spouse, overexerting yourself and avoiding at-home pregnancy tests, you will save yourself some unnecessary heartache, concern, hopelessness and doubt.
Although we don’t know the fate of our IVF procedure just yet, we will remain hopeful and pray without ceasing.